This time we have a story from our trainer, Oriane Boyer:
A few months ago, three friends, who are also colleagues, and I started a project focused on bringing Nonviolent Communication, Empathy and Mediation to children, teens and the adults who work with them: teachers, parents, psychologists, etc.
We happily received offers from various institutions, such as schools and psychologists organizations, invited us to share our work.
Our organizational meetings became quite intense, with many decisions to make. Efficiency and clarity in organization were essential.
One day, during one of our meetings, I was in the process of moving to the countryside, leaving the city to join a collective project in a village. This significant change brought stress, anxiety, and many fears, as moving is quite a challenge for me—changing habits and facing the unknown.
Shortly after our initial connection round (we always start our meetings by sharing how we are), I broke down in tears. I was unable to focus on decision-making, finances, or other important practical matters. All my stress and anxiety poured out, and big tears rolled down my cheeks.
Immediately, my three friends changed our planned agenda, despite our ‘deadlines,’ and chose to offer me empathy and presence, supporting me through my waves of pain. They understood that adhering strictly to our schedule would not address what was truly alive and important—for me, for them, and for the project.
For 30 minutes, they held my hands, silently listened, and occasionally guessed my feelings and needs, reformulating them, and following me moment by moment on my emotional journey without trying to fix me. After 25 minutes, I felt calm and safe again and asked for advice. I wanted that. We spent five more minutes, and I appreciated the collective intelligence at work, which brought different ideas for my move and provided support.
I felt refreshed, quiet, and clear-headed, ready to proceed. In the next hour, we were able to focus on logistics and practicalities, making important decisions for the project with ease.
I wish all projects and business environments had the skills to hold human emotions as strongly as they handle logistics and decisions. We decided to call it: The Art of Compassionate Efficiency.
Thank you for reading,
Oriane